Okay, I’m beginning to think that I must have really offended some all-powerful being who has decided that it would be fun to throw as many challenges in my way as possible when it comes to this show. As my Music Director (who is the one who officially hired me for this job) said today, “Our show is doomed! Doomed!” Why, you ask, when I had such a positive post about it yesterday, and a really successful (and short) tech today. Let us review, shall we:
- Very few of the theater students auditioned for the show
- I asked people from the theater department to stage manage for me, and every one of them decided that they had to get jobs rather than help.
- Before I even started rehearsal, two performers quit.
- I went into the rehearsal period without a stage manager, and was only able to find one about three weeks in. The only reason I found one is because one of my cast’s boyfriend wanted to spend more time with her. He is a football player with no theater experience, and not much motivation to learn.
- During the third week of rehearsal, one of the few actual theater students involved, quit two minutes before rehearsal began for COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS REASONS. He, of course, was the person with the most lines. I came up with what I think was a pretty good solution, but only time will tell.
- Another one of the male performers was having family/transportation/job issues which meant he could rarely make it to rehearsal. I eventually had to let him go.
- Eventually the cast settled down to three guys plus my Music Director who is also taking on a role, and 5 women. They are all fabulous!
- The softball coach scheduled a tournament for this weekend (which was the planned date of the performances) and refused to compromise so that our two softball player performers would be able to perform, forcing us to change the dates of the show.
- After we bent over backward to accommodate her, she still decided to pull her players out of rehearsal on Thursday so her team could go shopping to the movies and spend the night in a hotel, even though they could have left early this morning and still had plenty of time to get to the tournament.
- One of my other actresses was falsely arrested because some other woman with her name blew off a court date and some other stuff. Basically Bad J stole Good J’s identity. Luckily she was only in jail for 1 1/2 hours, but it has really upset her and added stress that was not necessary.
- Another male performer has been out sick all this week with a migraine that lead to constant vomiting.
- Last night, during a dry tech rehearsal (no actors, just tech) my stage manager informed us that he could not be here today, for the technical rehearsal scheduled so that he could learn what he needs to do. Nathan took over as Stage Manager, and the “boyfriend” will now be running lights. One of the other crew members cannot be here for two of the three dress rehearsals, and I still need at least one more person to help out.
- And finally, today one of the guys went into the hospital to have his appendix removed which means we may have to cut his numbers, one of which includes some of the fabulous puppets that Nathan spent hours making.
So now, with all that, I am going to end with a prayer to appease the gods and goddesses and anyone else who needs appeasing. Hopefully they will not be offended by this next attempt at creativity. I’m including as many of the ones connected with the arts or other issues in this story as I can find, so that I don’t offend any possibilities. I used this site , as it had a truly diverse list. Ahem:
Apollo, who loves music, poetry, art
allow our songs to “Rock the School House!”
and make our “subjects sing!”
Dagda, Irish father,
give us an Irish toast
to welcome laughter and the joy it brings.
Dionysus invite your followers
to join us in a theater full of music and life,
toast to our success.
Ganesh remove our obstacles
and share your wisdom
to allow all these talented students to sing.
Hephaestus recognize the sculptural art
of puppets and give them life.
Hermes allow the poems to speak
and share the messages with young and old.
Hygeia, Goddess of Health
please help my actors return in strength.
Odin, Norse Father God
grant us the inspiration to make theater magic work.
Santoshi, Goddess of Patience
help me let go of the frustration
and give the gift of a fabulous show.
Spirits of power,
whoever you are
whatever name you choose
Grant this group of hard-working folks
the opportunity to amuse.
If I missed anyone, please forgive me and allow my cast the joy of a successful show!