A lake in New Hampshire.
On a boat.
The Idiot was nowhere near us, but I borrowed a few lines of his style since his post about Jaws and the discussion following made me flash on this particular memory.
We had a couple of lovable idiots on the boat. One of them, I called Daddy. The other was an old family friend named Hank. They had taken us out on a boat and I remember floating on the middle of the lake when both of them went overboard.
I’m not sure it was by choice. In later discussions my older sister (by five years) said that there was beer involved, and some sort of horseplay.
They were under water for a long time, and came back up covered in black gunk.
“What happened?!” I asked.
“We were attacked by a giant octopus.” Daddy said. And Hank reinforced his story.
Of course, I believed them. I mean, isn’t every New England lake inhabited by giant man-eating octopi?
Now, despite the fact that The Idiot said,
“Lisa – There is nothing I take more pride in….than dredging up old, deep, psychological wounds and memories……. So glad I could help ”
I’m not really wounded by the gullible naiveté of that little girl, instead I am saddened that I can no longer give into that complete and utter belief of childhood.
I can no longer lie in my bed at night on Christmas wishing that, since Santa wouldn’t come to my house and bring me presents, he would at least let Rudolph knock on my window and take me for a magical ride.
I can no longer wander through a Halloween night, wondering if some of the creatures wandering the streets are real. [OK, I can, but I'm not supposed to admit it ;)] I cannot sit in a pumpkin patch and wait for the appearance of the Great Pumpkin. I never did that, but I always empathize with Linus when watching the special, I want so much to believe.
I can no longer wish upon a star, bursting out into song of course, and expect my wish will come true with a simple spark of fairy magic.
I can no longer run through the streets on a cool spring evening searching for Elijah in hopes that he might appear.
I can’t wander through a house that I am not familiar with looking at closet doors and wardrobes wondering if I can find an opening to a world like Narnia through one of them, and hoping I will.
More often than not, I’m driving the car, so I can’t give into the traveling fantasies of my childhood days, where I am riding a horse along the side of the road or conversing with a person just like me who lives among the stars.
I’m not supposed to believe in fairies and leprechauns, ghosts and goblins, or anything else truly magical. But that is a true loss. I wrote recently how much I would like to think like an eight year old, and I mean it.
The other day Nathan found our old video tape of Hook (1991) starring Dustin Hoffman, Robin Williams, Julia Roberts, and Maggie Smith (love her) and directed by Steven Spielberg. Now, some people called this movie a flop, but I always loved it. Why? Because it reminds all adults, and even kids, of the value of imagination and believing in magic. How can you not love the following scene where a meal of nothing turns into a feast of fabulosity (and I know I made up that word)?
I want to get back on the boat and believe in the octopus, because believing in the impossible makes this world and this life a place full of possibility.
Don’t you think?