I haven’t posted in over a week. I’ve started several posts, but they went nowhere and remain floating in the draft folder as future possibilities.
I’m not blocked. I simply have nothing to say.
I hoped for a spark from the 100 Word Challenge, but no . . . it doesn’t inspire me this week.
I have nothing to say.
The hilarious and talented Tori over at The Ramblings offered me a Sunshine Blogger Award as well as an invitation of sorts to play Blog Tag, if I understood her post correctly. Since it feels rare to get an invite to play, and because I like the image for this award, I decided to break my silence for now, even though I still have nothing to say.

So I will attempt to answer Tori’s question, but in typical rebellious Lisa fashion I will not tag anyone else at the moment. Not that I don’t think you there are many wonderful, sunshiny blogs and bloggers out there, but I simply cannot come up with any questions to ask because, I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY! I am also not nearly as funny or interesting as Tori, so my questions would be mundane in comparison. Here is my attempt to say something out of nothing:
1. Life is all about making David Letterman happy. What’s your most entertaining Stupid Human Trick? I make the best guppy face in the history of the world. I also learned recently that I am unable to pop popcorn on the stove without destroying the pot and my ego . . . that takes talent.
2. What’s your most traumatic experience? Dancing with a man dressed as a woman who was being forced into prostitution by the Japanese mafia. For the full story read “A Strange Day in Japan”
3. What one word best describes you? Freak?
4. Cake or Cake? (Note: Trick Question!) Cake, of course, with rich frosting.
5. If you were a celebrity and thus legally obligated to name your offspring something horrendous, what would your little bundle of publicity’s name be? Success
6. Who would win in a girly pop/dance/hair flip battle, Bieber or Beyoncé? I have to vote for Beyoncé, because if you ask me to even look at Bieber my eyes would start to bleed.
7. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck? I don’t know how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood, but I wonder how many words would a wordless woman write when a wordless woman has no words?
8. If given the opportunity to get away with it, who or what would you like to punch? Anyone trying to trample on the rights of women anywhere.
9. Desperate times call for weird measures. What strange career would you try to make that money, honey? I refuse to answer on the grounds that my life is a strange career already.
10. What’s one thing you can’t live without? Sleep
11. The most important question of all of ever and everything: Big Spoon or Little? Spork? How about chopsticks?
There you have it folks, my attempt to have something to say when perhaps the world is better of if I simply remain SILENT.
Sometimes silence is the answer.

Jun 12, 2012 @ 09:11:41
Hahaha. If you are this witty when you have “nothing” to say, then you are doing pretty well, missy. Loved your answers…. Chopsticks has me equal parts laughing and a little afraid
Jun 12, 2012 @ 09:28:36
I can’t sleep as the little spoon. I am too short for the big spoon. Sporks are silly. So chopsticks all the way.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 09:30:03
So sorry I didn’t inspire this week. This is a good way to say something when you have nothing to say!
Jun 12, 2012 @ 09:32:23
You are not to blame, I just haven’t been getting those 100 word juices flowing lately. I promise, I shall return.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 10:04:06
Entertaining. Congratulations on the award. I’ve fallen behind on award acceptance, and am not even sure if I can follow the bread crumbs back.
I’m a little short on words right now too. Maybe it’s the season. Do you have a camera?
Jun 12, 2012 @ 10:12:43
Sadly, even my camera eye seems to be a little blind lately. Part of that comes from inconsistent weather, but I’m sure that too will pass. I loved your post today. You may feel short of words, but whenever you write you touch me, and that is an incredible gift.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 11:14:59
Thanks, Lisa. That’s a very kind thing to say.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 10:25:28
hmmm, those were some tough questions. I think I would name my offspring Off-$pring. The dollar sign adds a nice touch, don’t you think.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 10:43:39
Ooh, I like that. I suppose my offspring could be named $uccess, but that defines success in a way that I rebel against. Maybe I would name mine AntiChrist. Would that be evil of me?
Jun 12, 2012 @ 14:22:12
not at all…especially since we are talking hypothetically. I will then name mine- Anti-The$i$
Jun 12, 2012 @ 11:29:34
Well, that was certainly a hilarious nothing to say!! I agree with Tori!
Jun 12, 2012 @ 11:46:47
Sometimes the funniest things come from nothing.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 12:37:31
Sometimes quiet is just just what’s needed, but I’m so delighted you posted this, as it was HILARIOUS! I love your wit! I just love it!
Hugs,
Kathy
Jun 12, 2012 @ 12:38:56
I must have hit my funny bone this morning. It doesn’t happen often.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 23:52:53
Silence is good… makes for witty posts.
Jun 13, 2012 @ 06:43:53
“Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.”
William Shakespeare
Read more at
Jun 14, 2012 @ 00:06:24
This is a pretty awesome “nothing to say” post if you ask me! I especially liked the outrageous offspring name. I went to school with a guy who wanted to name his kid “Cancer”. Not like the zodiac sign… like the disease. Seriously?
Jun 14, 2012 @ 06:46:09
That is so wrong! Why would anyone want to do that to their child? Maybe in the hopes of warding off the disease by claiming it.
Jun 14, 2012 @ 06:55:38
Congrats on the award! Inspiration will come, it always does!
Jun 14, 2012 @ 07:00:41
From the strangest places.