The Miles We Travel in Search of Ourselves

A Long Road Home

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When you drive alone in a car for 8 1/2 hours it gives you a lot of time to think.

Of course, you can distract yourself by listening to the stories of other people or music. But that distraction only works if your mind isn’t constantly connecting what you hear with what you think or believe.

I learned that as tears poured down my face while listening to “The Tornado Prom” story on This American Life.

I learned that laughing my way through Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me and thinking, I would love to be a reporter on NPR.

I learned that listening to the podcast about Pop Culture from NPR (I’m not sure what it’s called, but it is connected with Monkey See. The discussion of books led me to think, “Oh, I should read that” but even more “How do I get paid to review books.”

When I lost the ability to listen to the podcast, and went to music, every song had a message for me . . . about life, about love, about following your dreams.

And the miles passed.

I thought about the millions of miles that I have traveled throughout my life. Sometimes the miles led to adventures, sometimes the miles led to comfort, but rarely have the miles led to home. I mean, I am technically “home” now, but I haven’t found the home that makes me stop wanting to following those miles.

Will I ever?

I’ve found temporary sanctuaries, but not permanent homes.

I was talking to the cook at the Summer Theater where I left Nathan and she asked “Where are you now?” I answered, with my usual “Kansas face”; the face that says I’m here for now, but hopefully not forever. She answered, “Oh, I thought you would be wandering gypsies” and then told me about this family she met in Florida that were travelling the country just to see if they could.

Part of me thought, how cool is that.

My journey is long–both the metaphorical one and the physical one. I wonder if and when I will ever come to rest.

9 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Arlee Bird
    May 26, 2011 @ 19:11:11

    Back when I used to be on the road a lot I always looked forward to Saturday evenings when I’d listen to Prairie Home Companion on my way to the next town. NPR offered some great listening when I was in receiving range.

    Sometimes I miss those old road days, but it feels good to be rooted at home too.

    Lee
    Tossing It Out

    Reply

  2. Kathryn McCullough
    May 26, 2011 @ 21:32:41

    I can appreciate your restlessness. We love our home in Kentucky, and our famiies are here. However, I don’t know that it’s where my soul ultimately belongs. Hope you find your heart’s home soon, my friend!
    Kathy

    Reply

  3. nathan010
    May 27, 2011 @ 00:20:47

    The NPR show was Pop Culture Happy Hour

    Reply

  4. vixter2010
    May 27, 2011 @ 07:15:20

    I hope you find where your rightful home is but remember you have your husband and daughter and wherever they are is the true home 🙂

    Reply

  5. Aligaeta
    May 27, 2011 @ 09:47:54

    There is a sense of freedom in your unsettled life style that is clearly seen from one who is grounded, rooted, or trapped in one particular place.

    That freedom means you have a world of unlimited possibilities many of which you have had the fortune to explore throughout the years.

    As they say… the grass always looks greener…

    I wish you peace.

    Reply

  6. nrhatch
    May 27, 2011 @ 09:48:35

    Wherever you go . . . there you are.

    Enjoy the journey!

    Reply

  7. Tori Nelson
    May 27, 2011 @ 11:22:45

    That’s what everybody wants, to feel settled and at home.

    Reply

  8. thepetalpusher
    May 28, 2011 @ 07:17:45

    I must admit that long drives in the car are very thought provoking. Once you are home and with your family, those thoughts of wandering will dissipate.

    Reply

  9. Bluebell Books
    May 28, 2011 @ 17:45:29

    reflective words.
    each thousand mile starts with one single step…life is a journey indeed.

    smooth sailings.
    you seem got superb talent in writing a prose or poem…

    Greetings:

    How are you?

    Check out our short story slam today,

    We love creativity, your contribution is invaulable to us.

    Cheers.
    Happy Saturday.

    xoxox

    Reply

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